My Mom the Theologian

After the private viewing before my grandfather's funeral, there was a lot of sitting around talking and sharing. It was during this time that my Mom said something rather profound about my grandfather. She said, "He didn't love us because we were the perfect family - we're far from perfect - we became the perfect family because of his love for us."

I wanted to chip in right then that she'd perfectly echoed G.K. Chesterton and had hit upon a rather foundational spiritual truth, but decided it wasn't really the time to share. In his book, Orthodoxy, Chesterton wrote, "Men did not love Rome because she was great. She was great because they had loved her."

Both Mom and Chesterton speak of the fundamental, transforming power of love. I have understood for some time now, that to truly change something, you do not criticize it, you do not judge it, you love it. I Peter 4:8 says, "Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins." Love looks past the faults and sees someone for who they truly are, for who they can truly be.

As I sat there, listening to my family talk, however, I realized that loving someone is only the first step to changing them. Love allows you to see a person as they truly are, but that is not enough. I tell people I care about them regularly and they don't necessarily become better people because of it.

We need to encourage one another. Encouragement is communicating with another how you see them through love. 1 Thessalonians 5:11 says, "Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing." This verse is awesome. Not only does this verse give the Thessalonians a command, but it encourages them to follow it! Paul is communicating what they need to do and saying, in love, that he knows they'll do it.

I realized that my Mom has done this for years and probably because of the legacy my grandfather has given her. It finally clicked after about the hundredth introduction at the funeral when she would say, "This is Brett. He's my creative son, he's my writer."

The simple truth of the matter is that I'm a writer that doesn't write very much. Regardless, to her, I am her writer. Whenever she said that, it reinforced the idea in my mind that I am a writer, I have worth as a writer and it made me want to write more.

If men simply loved Rome, but never spoke of their vision of what she could be, Rome would have been little more than a footnote in the pages of history. Love without encouragement has no transformative power whatsoever.

If we were to love others and communicate that love through encouragement, how would we change each other for the better? How would we change the campus? How would we change the world?

Far too often, I hear people say, "I only tease the people I care about." But long after the laughter fades, I guarantee the subtle barbs of your humor will be sticking in someone's heart. That sort of humor points out the flaws and sins of others. Love should cover a multitude of sins. Encouragement should communicate your vision of others as flawless.

Take a moment to think about the people you love. How have you encouraged them lately? What have you been reinforcing in their mind, their flaws or their strengths? What can you do today to encourage someone?